My World

Fortunate - Unfortunate

2009-10-26T17:48:00.003+08:00

Series of event in short moments...

As i planned for the daily runnin routine.. i got changed and decided to get out of house.. Well.. fortunately.. the weather was kind to me.. a little bit of wind.. just enuff to keep me cool yet not enuff to apply wind resistance.. humidity was ok too.. so.. i would dehydrate too fast..

UNFORTUNATELY~ they decided to hve SOCCER MATCH which is at 7pm! knn.. which bugger go lock the gates at 5pm.. ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

On my way back.. i saw a mother along with her kid at the traffic road.. like many of us.. we were waiting for the bloody light to turn green.. sooooooo as i took a glance at her... she was eatin longan~ wooooo nice nice.. BUT~!!!! SHE BLOODY THREW THE SHELLS ON THE FLOOR~!! WHILE HER KID WAS THERE~ how fortunate OR UNFORTUNATE for the boy to hve a mother that shows disrespect for nature and courtesy... god bless u boy.. =)

I finally reached my house void deck.. and i saw some1 familiar~ WOOoooo its one of my neighbour's kid~ so i decided to call out to him.. but he didn't seem to hear me.. so i got louder.. he continued to ignore me.. wah damn sad.. but i decided to go over and disturb him~ as he ran pass me smiling.. i noticed somethin.. he had a listening aid on him... which afterwards i came to realise from his aunt.. that he is now offically deaf.. that means he wasn't deaf b4.. but just in few yrs.. he became one~! Played with him awhile.. very nice to him laffin...

Innocence..

There's an old saying.. every birth is a blessing.. but for a boy at that young age to lose the world of music.. is that still fortunate? or isit unfortunate for his birth?

Freedom - unbound chains.....

2009-10-24T22:16:00.002+08:00

Freedom

Unbound by chains of hate or love
Unbound by chains of lost and hope
Unbound by chains of sadness and happiness
Unbound by chains of problem and solution
Unbound by chains of restriction and choice

Freedom = living?

Suffocating

2009-10-21T16:55:00.003+08:00

Went to sch for freakin an hr onli... tutorial was cancelled so the entire day in sch like wah so fast end.. it was like a freakin waste of time and money sia...

After sch went to jurong library to do some read up and revision.. to like.. refresh the different terms and stuff la.. but clearly.. i couldn't concentrate... my mind was abit occupied.. though i said calmly i wanted to live a studious life for now.. but it doesn't seem to be tt easy.. for couple of reasons..

Recently feeling abit suffocating.. like becos of many thins happening.. i cannot breathe properly.. there's alot of thins i wanna heck.. but at the same time i can't.. there are some thins i shldn't noe.. but i noe.. and there are also thins tt i shld noe.. but i wasn't told (later i found out from other ppl).. all these thins.. like.. crashing me.. but its ok.. i believe i am strong..

Currently.. i'm in love in runnin.. it used to be my most hated sport.. its so boring.. and tiring.. there is no motivation in running.. mayb except tt its free? haha..

so why now i'm liking it?

When i running.. i can feel my heartbeat goin faster and louder.. as i run longer period.. i can feel my breathing gettin louder.. all these shows me and tell me that.. i'm alive..

The aftermath of runnin is definitely shagness all over.. but.. the blood rush makes me feel very awake.. so much so that as i cool down.. i can sort out my thoughts and feelings better.. trust me.. its a good remedy..

Rite now.. its really the onli thin tt keeps me goin on.. and each time i can run finish the target timing.. i feel that anythin is possible.. runnin gifs me strength.. so the plan is to run at least once a day.. Tml most likely i will be runnin twice in a day.. since sch start late and end quite early.. just nice can train for napfa also..

Tryin my best to be as untroubled as possible.. not so nice to be affectin other ppl.. as for the rest of the thins.. i will try to settle them.. gif me time.. i promise everythin will all work out fine..

A pic to lighten up the mood~~ if any1 feels like runnin.. can join me.. or i join u.. haha..

Resolves...

2009-10-20T18:33:00.003+08:00

Back from a great run with ah wei~ haha... bloody hell.. its almost impossible to pace him.. very fast.. but becos i was pushin my limit.. after the run.. i felt very good~ like very refresh.. Since i just got back.. decided to blog 1st while waiting my body to cool down b4 showering...

2nd day of sch still quite slack.. since i didn't had to do my fyp.. it was like i hvin alot of time.. but how to make use of these time is more impt...

Since sch started and this is my last sem... i felt that i need some determination.. so the plan goes as this.. Slowly.. as the day passed.. i will slowly do more reups.. and by next week... i will cut down on most of outings.. gaming.. etc. and mayb even msn also... and i will start working on revision notes.. and during free time.. will do reading up to refresh my memories with all the different terms and mechanisms..

I noe i can stay still very well.. so most likely the onli outing i will do is running... haha.. keep fit and drain energy..

Basically.. the plan is to go back to my studious JC lifestyle.. since this is the last sem.. it would be good to aim for good grades so that my report slip will look alot better after graduation.. and it should save me money also..

Er.. in a way can say i'm goin to live my own world for the next few months.. haha..

Oh ya.. the big plan... i dunno la... frankly speaking... though i put in effort as a b4 grad gift... but.. it seems like.. hmm. not sure how to put it in words.. but.. since next week onwards my plans are as of above.. i think.. i will leave it as it is... i not goin to put any pressure.. 有就有... 没有就没有.. if it has to come.. den do last min work lor.. if not.. den forget it.. the items mayb i just gif away.. since its not interested by any1.. dun wan people feel i forcin or pressuring...

Just wondering.. when will my pay come in? haha.. hope it comes in real soon...

Stuck in the future?

2009-10-19T22:05:00.002+08:00

Woot... 1st day of sch already feel sian.. HAHAHA.. lucky.. not alot of work to do.. but the way Dr Koh is teaching.. is like.. telling you.. find out the answers urself.. lol.. he nv do any explaination on the board or the purpose of the practical.. independent learnin huh.. must see how liao..

As sch starts.. this declares my last sem in NP liao.. wah farkin sian.. like 3 yrs passin by sooo quickly.. and everytime i try to imagine wat will it be like after graduation... wat will i be doin.. its just darkness.. exactly how i felt when i was in army still thinkin Uni/Poly.. the onli difference... no more choices.. haha.. do or die.. this really makes me feel nervous.. cos.. its like.. if i screw up at this stage.. everythin i worked for in the past 2 1/2 yrs.. gone~ wah.. always ended up me not able to sleep.. i will toss and turn until i eventually gets very very tired..

Went to check on Miki just now.. looks like she is doin great.. although i noe she haven really gotten pass the unfortunate event.. but at least she is now able to live with it.. well done! although it will eventually be a scar in her heart...but i believe.. strongly~ she will make it! jiayou!

Ok~ finally done with my lab report.. haha.. off to work on my plans.. =P hoping to sleep by 11:30pm~ nites........

no more AP

2009-10-18T22:07:00.002+08:00

Been workin at suntec for the past 2 days from like 6am to 5 pm.. freakin siong.. not becos of the physical work.. but rather becos of the mental stress tt the customers keep givin...

It was a front desk work for an event organised by the NHG which.. they hvin a annual seminar thingy.. The person who was in charge of us.. is a total AP = attitude prob.. briefing on thurs.. we had to wait for her more den an hr to get a 20 min briefin done.. best.. she is so stressed up.. tt she cannot organised her tots properly.. but heck la..

On the day itself.. wah.. the NHG helpers were like late in settin up nvm.. den every1 likes to crowd at the counters.. like how to work sia.. but at least 1st day we maanged to organise ourselves very quickly.. but on the 2nd day.. there was switch in the people.. and worse thin this auntie ar.. buay tahan.. act smart.. but not thinkin smart.. makin our counter worse nia.. practically almost every1 kanna kan by AP b4.. for me was like.. i was waitin for reprint.. den she pass the badge over den keep pointin to the bag.. which she wanted me to pass her.. but i was focusin on tryin to pass my customers info for reprint.. den she say i spacin out.. the rage was on.. but i held it in..

I've worked at many service job b4... gettin scolded, backstabbed, implicated by some1... its all ok.. but this time... the management is soooo poor.. tt the lack of communication is killin me.. but its another lesson learnt.. totally reminded me tt... in reality.. u dun get to choose people u hve to work with.. so must learn to tolerate.. learn to work even smarter den b4...

Overall.. i still had fun la.. since made quite few new friends.. quite entertainin ppl.. hahaha..

Workin on a special project for a week liao.. hopefully i can pull thru to get the best results.. hahaha.. can say tt i hve put in everythin i feel in it.. hopes it get thru..

drink drunk drama..

2009-10-15T00:20:00.002+08:00

Went out for a movie with pf peeps.. and we had aston for lunch.. which after tt we like had to chiong to the cinema cos we were sort of runnin short on time.. haha.. we decided to watch at some random place instead of town.. which... ultimately led to AMK hub.. lol.. i also dunno why..

after tt.. gibby got bike lesson.. jerald gotta go back sch.. so like left 4 of us.. went to PS to chill and set down at Carl's junior.. which i had to go back for dinner ard tt time.. but den.. the other 3 fellows~ kope my things.. keep makin me go timbre with them~ but den i promised my mum back for dinner... wah sibei sian.. like take 1 step forward also wrong.. take 1 step back also wrong.. but i cannot go home la.. they left with my thins and die die dun return.. ended up i follow them all~ the way to timbre.. and i tot they would release me.. den they told the waiter.. table for 4.. wah sian diao~~~~~~

Got in.. ate and drank.. listen to nice nice band playing and singing.. quite good.. and had a crazy time... but it wasn't to the fullest.. cos my mind was abit occupied.. by 2 thins.. 1 is miki.. and the other is .. dinner...

I heard from the gang.. miki is lookin very good.. and she is speakin with confidence and sense now.. which really drop a stone off my chest.. but still shld keep an eye.. just in case... as for that bastard.. seems tt 1 of my buddy has some leads liao.. ccb.. we're comin for ya SOON...

Just got home and finishin my "dinner" cos of the guilt.. like dun wanna waste the food and effort..

Got some sort of big plan comin up.. haha.. like hoping to leave some memories b4 thins might change.. ya.. deep in me.. i admit.. i'm afraid.. guess that i'm still a human afterall..

Tears down the cheek.. heart broke into pieces..

2009-10-13T20:39:00.004+08:00

Ytd had the cheapest hair cut eva~ 3.50 nia~ and not too bad la.. cannot ask for more at this pricin.. haha.. but i think ytd was like monday's blue? the hair dressers all their face are "black" and mine.. she spray some watery abit sticky liquid to wet my hair and abit of styling.. den while she was cutting.. she comb away my hair.. so eventually.. her comb got a bunch of hair~! den she FLICK~! and the bunch of hair SLAP my face! i was like STUNNED~! cos i was abit laggin in my mind.. due to the overnite thin.. i totally didn't noe how to response except keep cool and let her finish..

Got home.. showered.. den went to get dinners for the ladies~ 我是你的男佣~ the song u noe? hahaha.. while gettin dinner I MET SOME1.. this person IS A MUST TO MENTION! cos~~ he sold me a book at HALF THE PRICE.. AND GAVE ME THE OTHER FREE!!! omg~~~ den got free poster~ and bookmark!! I LUB U BRO~ HAHA! u made me and my partner happy ppl.. i noe u dun like ur names to be mentioned.. so i'll keep my mouth ZIPPED~!

After the surprisely good deal by my holy idol~ haha.. went to miki house~ den it seems the house was quiet.. so i prepared dinner.. and ALL THE SUDDEN! PING PIANG BOOM BANG! wah up stairs like hvin war~ i got shock! run up.. saw the girls all goin diff room.. 1 by 1 .. went in.. damn.. all had red eyes.. the onli guess i hve.. they had very very straight forward tok.. joan has the habit of being very frank.. and my guess was correct... miki was the last person i approached.. and somehow i got them out of the room for dinner while we had a long chat... after tt... miki seems alot better.. not becos of me wor~~~~ but i believe the trash tokin btw the gals did the job... spent another nite there.. and came back in the mornin...

I GOT DO MY WORK WOR~!!! partner came down do log book.. while i plan out the report and ppt.. haha 难为她了.. all the way from woodland down.. but really need the sleep.. and we did our work!! yeah! BIG CLAP FOR BOTH OF US! hahaha... daryl came along too~ and he INTERRUPTED MY TOTS dunno how many times.. HAHAHAHAHA...

After tt i decided to check on the ladiesZZZzz with my buddiesZZz~~ and miki looks ALOT BETTER..

Miki.. you are doin fine.. go enjoy ur life.. WE WILL DEAL WITH TT BASTARD =) i'm not goin to curse him.. cos I WAN TO SEND HIM TO HELL WITH MY OWN HANDS! =) its ok if i hve to go to hell too.. i will just.. GIVE HIM MORE HELL IN HELL FOR ETERNALTY! =)

Dun worry.. i'm cool... my hands are just itchy.. must noe.. its been years since i use them as weapons.. =) Mr bastard.. i luve you.. and i'm goin to kick ur ass... =)

very angry..

2009-10-12T02:38:00.002+08:00

Its 2.57am in the mornin and finally Miki is sleeping.. sharon me and joan spent the afternoon and nite accompany her.. and basically the rest of us goin to rotate this thru the week.. hopefully it ends well.. very sleepy.. but.. gotta stay awake so ensure miki is really alseep 1st.. poor miki had to go thru this at this point of time.. most likely joan will be sleepin in with miki until tml.. sharon got sch tml mornin.. so we'll be cabbin home together later..

Signs shown to all of us.. but.. we failed to see it earlier.. if not.. haiz..

And you bloody farker.. knnccb! Lets see how good can u hide! we are so goin fark u upside down.. the anger in me is seriously buildin up~! like its goin to snap any moment! this anger! this rage! if i see u~ i will send you straight to hell~! fark! We are so goin to hunt you down.. and the hunt.. has began!! you watch out!

Officially Missing You

2009-10-10T22:51:00.005+08:00

Went out in the afternoon to chris's house.. den took his guitar to play while the rest of the guys gamin... den wah.. suddenly inspired to sing and play.. so sort of tot thru wat song.. den i remembered recently saw a video post on a twin doin a cover on Tamia's song.. Officially Missing You.. so... i went to look for guitar tab and startin playin and sing.. and i recorded it down.. HAHAHA~~~~ ok.. i must admit.. I SUCK!! dunno isit becos its a girl's song.. so i cannot get my pitch correct.. my voice sounded weak.. and my pronunciation is screwed~ LOL~ and i like tried recordin until the 1st chorus dunno how many times but still sucky.. sang until my throat was dry..

It was also very difficult for me, this old man to sing and play at the same time especially i've not touched my guitar for years~~~~~~ oh well~

If any1 wans to listen.. try Tamia's version or go youtube search JS officially missing you.. the twins sang very well... i'm recommendin the song.. although its a couple of yr old song.. but its really straight.. simple.. and smoothing.. =) DO NOT... ASK FOR MY VERSION~! SILENCE~! I KILL YOU~! =P

After i got home.. my cousin came with all his and his gf''s stuff and he is officially a new member to my family~~ woohoo~~ lan gamin is no issue liao~ HAHAHA.. frankly speakin i dun even remember his gf's name la.. HAHA and my parents and i like goin to stay with them for very long sia.. really cannot imagine wat future life would be like.. after he unload his stuff we went to granny's house to celebrate his bdaY~~ had a great time with the cousins.. playing mahjong den played daidee.. den went to play heart atk which was extremely hilarious.. with that.. time just flew pass...

Tamia - Officially Missing You

All I hear is raindrops falling on the rooftop
Oh baby, tell me why'd you have to go
Cause this pain I feel it won't go away
And today I'm officially missin you

I thought that from this heartache, I could escape
But I've fronted long enough to know
There ain't no way
And today I'm officially missing you

Ooh...can't nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I~ I'm officially...

All I do is lay around, 2 years full of tears
From looking at your face on the wall
Just a week ago you were my baby
Now I don't even know you at all, I don't know you at all

Well, I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it's safe to say, baby, safe to say
that I~ I'm officially missin you

Ooh...can't nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I~ I'm officially...

Well, I thought I could just get over you, baby
But I see there's something I just can't do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can't find a way to let go of you

Ooh...can't nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do, hey, baby
Said it stays on my mind
And I~ I'm officially...

It's official
Hoo, you know that I'm missin you, yeah, yes
All I hear is raindrops, oh, yeah
And I~ I'm officially missin you

expect the unexpected..

2009-10-09T21:00:00.000+08:00

Today finally met up some of my good friends.. but i was like damn late.. i woke up late.. den the aches all over the body.. omg~~~~ it was difficult to get out of house.. hahaha...

Well.. i met them at the usual spot.. the 1st thin i did after sitting down.. was the EAT~! lol~ damn becoming real pig liao.. we had a long chat .. it seems that every1 changed.. but not everything... as usual.. every1 was "shooting" at each other.. lots of laughter and fun~ its like in the process~ u get automatically get to noe wats happening in each other daily lives.. the best part i felt was.. the trust.. its still all in us.. it doesn't matter whether wat bad/unglam thins we shoot abt each other.. we all noe deep inside.. its ok.. although some of them started to flare ard~ lol~ but can tell la.. jokes.. jokes... it was also good to see those went overseas managed to meet up with us..

After tt.. we went to walk ard.. ended up the girls went shopping.. snore.. haha.. den we settled early dinner at marina square.. the guys were like complaining hungry liao.. lol..after tt we decided to chill at roof of esplanade...

It seems that every1 hving quite abit of problems... but one smart aleck said this.. always to expect the unexpected... in that way.. we are always prepared for somethin impossible.. wah.. like suddenly he become soooo holy~ rite.. priest jason.. hahaha..

The gathering was special.. cos.. its like.. though we dun really see each other.. yet.. there's nothin to hide between all of us.. well of cos in reality we do hve 1 or 2 secrets to keep within us.. but i felt very relaxed.. like we would say just anythin straight out.. sad.. happy.. angry.. there are people who u think u r very close to..yet they hve alot to keep from you.. and there are people u dun see often.. yet they are very frank with you..

Its like wat joel said b4.. its becos we say.. we feel.. we hear.. thats why our friendship lasted.. and as long as u stay true to it.. eventually it will answer u.. this really gave made me felt hopeful in life.. and with people ard me..

A old song dedication to all my friends.. sorry if i eva upset or disappoint any1.. and thank you for forgivin.. for all the wise words.. for all the fun and laughter.. for EVERYTHIN.. from deepest me..

Wind Beneath My Wings

Oh, oh, oh, oh -
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
To never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, thats your way.
You always walked a step behind.

So I was the one with all the glory,
While you were the one with all the strain.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.

Did you ever know that youre my hero,
And everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
For you are the wind beneath my wings.

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
But Ive got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
For you are the wind beneath my wings.

Did I ever tell you youre my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh, and i, I could fly higher than an eagle,
For you are the wind beneath my wings,

Oh, the wind beneath my wings.
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly away. you let me fly so high.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,
So high I almost touch the sky.
Thank you, thank you,
Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings.

damn napfa..

2009-10-08T23:51:00.004+08:00

Today was the freakin napfa... freakin made me woke up at 6am got the sch by 740am.. and stone for an hr.. finally start.. finished all 5 stations.. den guess wat.. started to rain HEAVILY.. so it began.. the stoning session... for like few hrs la.. den ppl were desperately tryin very hard to pass the 5 stations during this period of stoning.. den ended up.. they decided to cancel..wtf??!! Best part.. the next time we redo.. we redo EVERYTHIN.. snore..

Good thin i dun actually hve to do this.. but bad thin is.. i wanted to use this as a session to check my own standards.. end up no way to check the most impt part.. running.. and those who desperately tried to pass their failed stations.. wasted all their energy.. snore... wat happen to the wet weather prog man?! screwed up management.. again.. reallyfelt injustice for every1.. even army also allow recording of the stations score.. why the freakin sch cannot.. and its like JC and Sec School also can.. why only NP cannot..

Anyway.. i've decided to leave thins as it is.. if it comes.. den take it as a bonus.. if it doesn't... its within expectation.. thins that i shldn't noe and i noe.. just shut up.. thins i shld noe and i dun noe... even better.. dun need to be bothered.. just as long as i do my own part... i believe its more den enuff... and its almost time i focus back on my ultimate goal..

Wishing star for the nite............

I wish......... ___ ______ __ _ __ ________

Dun dare to hope...

2009-10-05T21:10:00.004+08:00

Early in e mornin recieved long waited sms.. and ok.. decided to go sch... to work on log book.. end up.. i was doin it alone..

Not that my partner didn't come.. but she came.. nv really do much.. den left.. very tempted to do so.. but .. would really beat the point of goin sch...

So.. alone in the lab.. i did the pasting and writing of log book quietly...

Recently i'm feeling fatigue.. not physically (even though i'm havin late nites) but more like spiritually.. i'm like not darin to hope any thins would go as plan.. since.. many times all ended up.. either.. forgotten.. or change of plans.. it really tires me out..

Its like.. u can happily think.. ooo tml goin to do this.. or tml goin this place.. but when the tml comes... the day would be forgotten/sorry.. i cannot make.. this constant behaviour is really makin me sian diao.. makin me confuse..

Its like.. i wanna plan this weeks prog.. but i'm not voicin out.. cos i'm like sian.. i'm gettin this mindset: "aiya.. later not free.. later somethin on.. later forget.. later change of plan again"

I'm not trying being pessimistic but these are results of facts... its now more like.. i'm scared.. so.. if i dun hope.. dun think.. mayb i'll feel less uncomfortable.....

Spamming songs like "GO" by Boys like Girls to keep my spirit up.. and not to think...

birthday

2009-10-03T20:54:00.002+08:00

1st Oct.. children's day.. china's national day.. billions of ppl celebratin my bday eh.. honored man~~ haha.. but den again... damn.. 24 already.. i hve spent 1/4 of my life..

On that day.. daryl, xiu and weisheng came crashing my house.. the couple neh neh 1.. last min pangseh.. den these 3 made me stone in my own room dunno how long to string up the present.. hahaha.. but it was cool and nice.. combined effort~ but neh neh~ huiting go cut my hair in the photo until it looks freakin flat and hilarious la.. den we spend our afternoon eatin.. and "fighting online" for IS module.. darn 2pid.. every sem hve to do this shit.. and played abit of wii~~~~~ and we made some age estimation thru the wii sports.. WAHAHAHAHA.. I'M THE YOUNGEST... SOME1(partner) 88 YEARS OLD WOR~~!! hahaaha

Just nice 1hin comin back today.. so pf peeps decided to go surprise him~~ met at popeye.. and started drawing on coloured papers... and janice put the most~~~ unglam photo of him la.. hahaha..b4 he arrived.. the peeps.. celebrated my bday.. with LACE UNDIES... RELIGHTABLE CANDLES.. and SUPER SWEET BROWNIES.. snore~~~ really doin dumb thins at airport gallery.. haha... once 1hin got back.. we cab down to his house... went geylang for supper.. reach home quite late sia...

Next day had bbq.. felt like zombie but its bbq man~ must be awake... must be fun~~ brought my 6 men tent.. went bought bbq stuffs.. got down to ecp real early~ until we had to stone for some time.. haha.. but the fire startin.. and bbq'in is very succesful man.. like everythin damn smooth.. while it supposed to be smooth.. there was unexpected thins like.. jenny didn't noe.. daryl and couple comin.. den last min yanxin came joinin also.. den i was like... oh no... and it always like.. ended up.. splittin into 2 groups.. abit sian diao.. but good thin is.. near the end.. we managed to play games together.. which was wat i wanted the bbq to be like..

But~ abit sian tt had to leave so early la.. like i tot it was a late nite event.. over nite event.. etc. even zak also tot so.. like nv really do much also.. got home.. chat on msn until almost 4.. woke up at 8 plus... den went down return xiu's ezlink card.. so sorry girl... totally 4gt tt it was with me.. den went walk walk somewhere... got home.. nap awhile.. and thats it~

These few days were fun~! but somehow also felt missin somethin... nope.. i;m not expectin a big party or wat.. in fact.. i nv really celebrate bday 1.. since like primary sch? so i'm quite used to just mayb dinner or short meet up...

Well~~ happy moments need HAPPY PIC~ ENJOY~ WAHAHAHA!

relaxation to gaming~

2009-09-29T23:04:00.003+08:00

Last fri had the most relaxing day at ECP~ it was suppose to be a exercise day but xiu and i ended up buying food and had a small picnic.. den wat comes after meal? NAP!! lol! the weather was wonderful~ PERFECT! There's sun.. yet not too bright~ and there's wind~ which made the environment very cool.. very smoothin~ best time for NAP! xiu like slept slightly over an hr.. and i slept like 1/2 an hr.. all thanks to the kids shouting here and there.. snore~ but it was more den enuff...

So that gave me the energy to do a little huntin during sat afternoon to look for a zi char stall in AMK that was featured in the TV.. the food look damn nice la.. i like saw the wrong blk and got off 1 stop earlier.. made me walked under the hot hot sun... snore~~~~ but hey~ i got the name card and the other branch~ which meanssssssss i dun hve to go to the AMK 1!!! best thin they got tel no. as well~ gotta try someday~

Mon did some work in sch.. like woOOOaH~~ finally sia~~ since xiu is goin to be busy for the week.. i started making plans.. although abit sian diao.. cos tue supposed planned to do somethin 1.. but anyway.. nvm.. shall enjoy~~ sms'ed tons of ppl.. and today we met up to play L4D~!! wah.. it was like more den 1/2 a yr nv play L4D with peeps liao la.. played all the afternoon... until onli left me at gib durin evenin time.. sian diao again~~~ we went off at 7 plus for dinner.. den walk walk lor.. den went home.. i think janice is goin to get it from 1hin when he comes back.. "tell u play L4d u say dun wan.. den now u go lan L4D.. hmpt~" hahahaha....

trip home shld be most borin thin.. but i was like sort of pissed off... cos this lady.. dress nicely.. had a big big shopping ball fully loaded.. stand behind me.. all the sudden~~~~ her bag dunno how.. just scrap pass my ankle portion of the leg~ i acted cool and man~~~ look back for split sec den turn back cont to use my hp... but actually.. IT WAS FREAKIN PAINFUL~~ the pain lasted me all the way home.. even when i shower it was freakin painful! lucky the cutS weren't deep.. but real reason i was sort of pissed.. is becos she didn't even bother to say sorry~~ and she knew her bag hit me la... but.. again.. very cool.. very man.. i sat down cont to use my phone.. hahahaha... oh well.. just my luck..

A cute smile for tonite and tml~ (looks damn fake and is fake.... HAHAHA! HECK~!!) hmm wat shall i do tml.. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm =D

mother's day~

2009-09-23T19:48:00.002+08:00

borin.. borin.. borin.. hahaa.. like didn't do much past few days.. except for a super long walk on monday to keep fit a little...

Today spent some quality time with mum.. yes.. she wun be workin for couple of days which is like i finally get to eat home cook food for more den a day.. hahaha.. went to update my address at the bank.. which i shld hve done like dunno how many yrs.. den now i realise why the internet banking nv send me any password.. knn.. all send to my old address.. lucky nothin disappear from my bank account.. phew~ den did some shoppin at ntuc with mum.. got home.. went out after dinner.. and chilled out a bit..

Hmm~ that shld be abt all... lol~ and the smile for the day~ *wink wink*~

1 YR PF 2008 ANNIVERSARY~

2009-09-20T21:53:00.002+08:00

1 yr lo~~ pf peeps still hanging out together.. and its great that we always have fun each time... wanted to hve dinner at zhen fa.. at least that was the plan la.. but the rest of them were full on Udder's ice cream and zhen fa was like woohoo! packed! totally forgt it was a weekend.. ended up in a so called "my shop".. xin wang HONG KONG cafe.. not the bloody taiwan piece of shit that ripped me off... arg~

After dinner we didn't really planned anythin.. but the funnie thin was.. every time we stop at a spot.. we will start tokin.. and its like endless la.. we even talked outside the toilet.. laffin away.. until like we realise we were blockin the way... anyway.. wanted to watch a movie but we somehow got lost in novena.. haha.. makin wrong turns and stuff... wasted alot of time before we got to town... no more walkin man.. haha.. and its like shermin no bus home.. so we decided just chill around.. played arcade awhile~ den went home.. basically.. 3/4 of the time.. we spend tokin and tokin and tokin.. hahaha..

For 1 yr anni.. i decided to upload a vid on fb.. unglam vid~ hahaha.. 1HIN i still got your national anthem hor!! muahahahaha

wah like after sooo long.. i finally manage to eat home cooked food.. my mum been workin late.. and i kept eatin packed food... the taste and feel is like so diff la.. and my mum updated my bankbook... FINALLY~~ my attachment money is in! wooohoo!! time to spend wor~~ of cos not all la.. haha...

Think tonite hve to sleep in earlier.. tml exercisin... like finally.. after days of food food food... really need to cut down on the fats...

A lovely pic for a good nite rest...

Another day~~

2009-09-19T15:00:00.003+08:00

A wonder nite to sleep in.. woke up feeling great~ like as though there was some inner peace within~ haha... went for a run.. felt even more refreshing! And while i sat down for breakfast.. i gave some thoughts..

True enough.. i may hve been a joke.. so wat.. those times were still great! i may hve drifted.. but those were still wonderful experience... i remembered some1 used to say..

"regardless of how sad or unhappy those memories were.. dun forget them.. live with them.. keep in your heart.. and used them to weave a better tml"

*nod nod* and.. i still dun think i can be those kind of selfish ass.. who thinks abt themselves only.. hahaha.. my heart is too soft.. just gif a slightly teary eyes.. just a little word, please~ and damn... i will say ok... so heck.. i'll just stay the way i am.. and even if i'm really at the losing end.. screw it~~~~~~~ someday i will definitely be recieving the winning price..

BUT~ the part about my parents checking my on results.. arg~~ really piss me off.. worse part i feel they hve the rights to do it... snore...

After a conference call last nite... now i noe what the issue was.. and yes i was referring to you guys in the previous post... and damn.. you guys stalkin on me isit.. so fast read my new blog... anyway... please do let me noe the problems in the future.. dun just shut off like tt.. after all we spent yrs together.. we done tons of thins for each other... and i'm really glad that we had that conference.. and the very fact u guys still read.. i'm still in your worlds.. BUT!! now u guys owe me 1 for makin me feel left out~!! haha...

ok~ meeting up PF 2008 peeps later for dinner~~ woohooo!! been such a long time we had a gathering.. a little bit sad not alot could make it.. but hell~ we always have fun regardless of no. of people!

Last thing~~~ i am happy.. with the past few years and months.. though times have been tough.. but i felt i had more laughter den tears...

A unique smile for the day~ lmao~

New home..

2009-09-18T21:24:00.001+08:00

A new home finally.. was almost goin to quit doin this after like wat.. 2 or 3 months of constant trying.. i had so much to say.. that its all piling up like hell.. yet rite now i dunno where to start from... crap...

Thins have been.... hmmm... complicated.. people around me.. things around me.. everythin is complicated.. and its so messy that i feel that my life is in a mess... as i struggle on the outside (to look cool~) i'm actually not doin so well on the inside.. i guess that years of stress is actually workin on me now... yes.. i'm tokin about stress... nobody will eva noe the amount of stress i'm facin.. aimin for the best in studies.. to actually proof that wateva choice i made was the right one.. every semester i may look like as if its not an issue to me.. but deep down.. i'm afraid... i'm soooo afraid that before the date of exam result release.. i can't sleep for few nites..

My parents hve high expectation.. my sis is worried.. people around me constantly askin.. with the success case of my cousin from poly to uni.. its like i cannot afford to fail.. last sem.. i got a 3.6gpa out of 4.. WOOHOO! 3.6 wor~~ SCREW IT! i was dishearten... i noe that the fact every1 didn't do well.. but i felt.. its my own result.. i reap it.. which means.. if i had work even harder.. i could hve surpass that score..

Speakin about parents.. today i got.. i saw my dad with my result slip which was mailed to me.. he was READING it... to put it in a easier context.. he was CHECKING it.. ha... wat a joke.. thats a amount of trust they hve in me... well done... very well done.. mayb it applies to all others as well.. i felt that.. no matter how close physically they are. to you.. they are actually not close at all... you can spend more den half a day with them.. and they wun feel a thin.. you can do hundreds of thins for them.. still they wun feel a thin.. i'm not even the sort that need a form of return.. but i just feel that my presence in their lives at all.. sad.................

"So close yet so far".. thats how i would like to phrase it... mayb i'm just not needed around.. and if thats the case.. there's nothin more that i can say.. mayb livin more selfishly... more self centred would be better.. afterall.. at the end.. its you.. yourself who you are living for..

Today i reflected on myself.. i'm a joke.. seriously..

Well.. down times are really hard on me.. but thats not to say i didn't enjoyed these few yrs.. these few months.. but.. i dunno.. if i'm actually happy or not...

Ok la.. mayb the accumulated stress is makin me too sensitive.. think positive.. think positive.. or i'll go mad...

Ok~ Lets just stop here for now.. before i need to take medication..